JESSIE'S VEGAS

My Grandma Thelma had a yellow chaise lounge. Maybe it was really more of the shade termed "maize". My mom used the maize color a lot in her wild-life oil-paintings(probably most during her  big cat phase). She always sold those paintings fairly quickly. Anyhow,Grandma's lounge sure reminded me of rows of sweet, tender "maize" or corn. It's yellow textured rows kept my lithe fingers occupied and I even liked the low hum my fingers emitted when I ran them over the rows fast enough during the Sunday afternoons we frequented grandma Goodwin's house.  I still dream of her house some nights. She passed away over five years ago, and Grandpa Goodwin passed away over eight years ago. Whenever I see a chaise lounge I think of Grandma and when I smell cigar smoke , it is my Grandpa Frank's slick white hair and impeccably buttoned shirt that come first to my mind. I was running today and passed a garage sale with a chaise lounge out front. Usually the item clo...

I sleep with my socks on. It reminds me of the time we visited Dodge City Kansas when I was in 3rd grade. At the cowboy grave yard, it was implicitly explained that every gunslinger was buried with their boots on. I couldn't figure out if that meant they were going to rematerialize and start a flurry of bullets around my head or that they had a happy shooting range in heaven. Nowadays,  I wonder if they just had cold feet like me. Anyways,  that was one memorable trip! My dad had turned a school bus into a motor home and painted a dragon on the side. He aptly named it the "gross dragon" and loaded his 6 kids and his best friends family up for a 21 state tour. There were some perks to having a Mormon hippie dad with ADD. I have seen all but 8 states, even if it was in the belly of a colorful purple bus dragon. Two days ago was my dad's birthday.  It took me a couple of days to call him. I was practicing up. My dad was a colorful character,  but he was never big on th...

"Sylvia, come on back!" The voice belonging to the woman behind the lab counter sounded "all business" when she called a new patient back. Her tone remained short and concise when I saw a Travis and a Paul go get their arms poked by the vampires in white coats too.  I couldn't help but chuckle a little to myself when I saw poor Juan come in with a brown paper bag.  It was obvious by his stooped stature and his unshaven face he wasn't feeling quite himself.  The contents of the bag would have remained "secret" except the woman behind the counter demanded to see the three specimen containers. Being a former ER nurse, I already knew the stool specimens the bag contained.  Juan blushed and conceded he had not been able to fill all the containers. The woman behind the counter let out a huge sigh. "Ohhh, well if you can't fill them all I don't know what we are going to do!" She stood up and looked at Juan like my mom used to look at me ...

I have not enjoyed attending doctor appointments a lone.  It is not so bad when the subject of the doctor's visit is my own body.  I can deal with that.  What I haven't been able to stomach very well are the doctor appointments where I receive some unusual news about a child.  The next time I find myself in the position to review test results about a child while I am alone sitting across from a physician, I am going to wear a sign. The sign will hang from my neck with yarn or string, doesn't really matter, and display a large HEART. If it were possible I would somehow show the heart beating and then of course the words "FRAGILE--HANDLE with CARE" embellished above the heart. I don't know if this would help or not, but I'm willing to try anything to soften the blow.  When I received the news last summer that one of my daughters "Might be in a vegetative state" someday, if I did not find the proper medicine, I stumbled out of that office and hyper...

Well, I could blame it on caffeine.I had more than my share today, ya' know.  I think it might be the grinding teeth in the night or getting kicked in the ribs more than the caffeine, though. We are having a slumber party to finish off a FABulouso President's Day weekend.As I see the tiny bodies and hear the gentle snoring surrounding me, I think of the best advice on parenting I've ever heard. "JUST ENJOY THEM". Sometimes when the chips have been down, the cards stacked against our tiny family, we have dropped everything and ran to the closest source of joy.  Maybe this has been like the old saying ," When you are hurt you can laugh or you can cry". Whatever the gurus say, this approach has put many,many miles on our car, but maybe it has ALL paid off. This past weekend,  when our oldest graduated from the first step on her college journey, CNA, my heart soared. We were at a church for the ceremonies.  The girls fought over who got to go in to see her....

One night I had a dream. I was giving a talk of sorts in an old-style cultural hall at a stake center. As I proceeded, I was dismayed that the audience was not only not paying attention, but their voices were soon drowning out mine. I spoke louder into my microphone, but it was to no avail. As I looked down into the crowd, I was suddenly intrigued! I had to join their throng! Before I knew what I was doing, I was down in the mass of bodies, and we were all together in a celebration of the color gray. There was a low buzzing noise in the room as we were each comparing and listing to each other the events of our lives. Many of them were sad and disheartening. The more we spoke, the louder the humming in the room grew and the closer we grew in proximity to each other. My heart was feeling more burdensome by the minute as I heard story after story of heartbreak and trial. We also seemed to be growing closer to each other. It was as if we were desperate to find some kind of comfort or warm...

It rained last night and there is no better thing to a parched desert floor. Dust swirls up and meets the rain and combines into wondrous mud. Previously dirt-strewn roads are suddenly clean and shiny. Small puddles of mirrored water become impromptu baths for desert fowl or swimming pools for Jessie's tiny toes. I did not miss this delightful morning because I actually had a day off! Going through the papers in Jessie's backpack I am confounded that the pile of notices from the school has mysteriously multiplied overnight. How does this happen? I unfold a pink paper and I realize I am going to miss the Mom's and Muffins again ... working that day too. Dani says " Who's going to help Jessie remember her "dance moves" when she tries out for the talent show? Aren't you working that day too?" I stop a moment and wonder how I was able to participate so much more in the past with my children in their schooling. I already know the answer and I sta...