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The leaf

Tears have spilled over onto my soggy pillowcase. Their damp, unwanted presence seep into my dream and interrupt my subconscious wanderings. I rub my sleep weary eyes in an attempt to reorient myself in time.  Where am I ? In my last thought I was old and then in the next scene I was young. My body turns and morphs somewhere to an inbetween indeterminate age.  "This is so silly, why can't my body make up it's mind if I'm young, old or somewhere in between?" And then , "Because you are all of those things! You are young, you are old, and not only in between,  you are eternal!" "Oh of course I am!Mr. Sandman!!Ok, if that's possible then take me back to the place where my kids were little, cuz that was the hardest yet best time of my life! So I teleported, actually Dave drove me in our old teal dodge van  which suddenly had the magical properties of a time machine, complete with the messy food stained carseats. We flew back to the beautiful wh...
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It Came Upon A Midnight Clear

The presents, the stockings and rising early before the sun rose up trying to see Santa are all beloved memories from my youth. I LOVED Christmas and bought into the whole North Pole fantasy without a second thought. To a child, the magic and promise  of "good things happening to the world" was not so hard to buy into. Fresher from heaven and angels, as a child, I did not think it was unusual for one man to load up his sleigh and visit every single house on Christmas Eve.  Of course he knew my name and every other child's name on earth. I did not have trouble believing in a babe that was born in a manger either.  Why wouldn't the donkeys, sheep and cattle surround that place and worship their Heavenly King?The thought of a salutory star rising in the Eastern sky,   guiding wisemen and sheperds made perfect sense. As the years have passed , my childlike faith has been replaced not so much with doubt, but with its bed-fellow fear.  The trials of the mortal j...
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Rain in the desert

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It rained last night and there is no better thing to a parched desert floor. Dust swirls up and meets the rain and combines into wondrous mud. Previously dirt-strewn roads are suddenly clean and shiny. Small puddles of mirrored water become impromptu baths for desert fowl or swimming pools for Jessie's tiny toes. I did not miss this delightful morning because I actually had a day off! Going through the papers in Jessie's backpack I am confounded that the pile of notices from the school has mysteriously multiplied overnight. How does this happen? I unfold a pink paper and I realize I am going to miss the Mom's and Muffins again ... working that day too. Dani says " Who's going to help Jessie remember her "dance moves" when she tries out for the talent show? Aren't you working that day too?" I stop a moment and wonder how I was able to participate so much more in the past with my children in their schooling. I already know the answer and I sta...
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